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A member registered Apr 11, 2017

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If you guys need to monetise the game, I'm okay with ads on computer/android, as long as they're non-intrusive and non-obstructive. That way, you can lower the price of the upfront cost if you have one.
What do you guys think? What does ARMY think?

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Hi, I wanted to make this topic to discuss the writing style of the visual novel; I believe that both the narrative and descriptive writing styles are interesting. This is more of a comment than an improvement: no problem if it isn't read. Props to you, Eglé - I really enjoyed it.

First up, this visual novel is OFF THE WALL! To the Edge of the Sky is so cool man. I'm showing all of my fellow ARMY friends the VN so that they can support it too. Thank you guys for making our dreams come true. From what I've seen and heard, the plot-line seems like it'll make a wickedly addictive story.

For the narrative writing style, it seems like a typical VN writing style, which is a fantastic base. I've only ever played one VN, which was a 2000s' Nintendo makeup VN...Interestingly, it took a similar theme to this in that romance was only a part of the story. I really enjoyed that. Anywhoo, it used the third-person 'Hannah takes the sword' style, as opposed to the first-person 'I take the sword' style. It looks like you guys have gone for style 2, which I feel like is an interesting way to make a VN as interactive as a VN can be in order to get ourselves immersed in the MC role.

When making a first-person narrative, I believe that the kind of personality given to the MC has to be looked upon pretty carefully, and I think that you guys've already nailed that pretty well. You don't want people getting the wrong impression from a first-person narrative - such as assigning the player an identity that they disagree with, or don't like. I believe that this is the biggest struggle with first-person narrative - in contrast to third-person narrative, where there's a slight dissociation that can give the player more control because they don't feel assigned a personality that they don't like.

Saying that, this is just one perspective of first-person narrative. I feel like you guys combat that most efficiently: you give us a choice of personalities through the action options, and the MC is pretty headstrong. At one point, I felt like she bordered on special snowflake, but I believe that that was me wrongly jumping to assigning her a stereotype too quickly. I felt control over my actions, instead of being assigned a personality like the aforementioned. I ended up liking her very much ^^

Onto the descriptive writing style: I believe that his matches up to the drawings neatly. I think that you guys are going down the best path with how often you describe things, lending itself to the 'novel' side of things. I believe that how the game is describing in first person appropriately tailors the point of view on the scene to that of the MC is a good way to drop hints about who they are/where they come from: I enjoyed that aspect a lot, since it wasn't too much.

However, I think that the way that the MC describes is too show-not-tell at times. I think that more abstract descriptions would match better with how she feels towards seeing e.g. the cherry blossoms for the first time. As opposed to 'trees with pink', perhaps 'lustrous, billowing pink-dressed mahogany trees that whistled slight songs with each breeze' - but maybe that's too pretentious for this VN LOL.

Ultimately, however, I believe that because you guys have balanced everything so well, my cons don't have as much prominence as they would in less-balanced VNs. I think that a big advantage is how well-balanced the VN is. I would like to have a few more-interactions with the characters. I love that aspect of VN, and that kind of control seems to be a big selling point in otome/VNs. Though even when I don't get choice-interactions, I enjoy the actual story playing out before me.

To conclude, I'm at a loss for words at how enticing this VN is :p I would definitely want an app, so I'm happy to hear that you guys could be doing one for android. I understand that this game took you guys just 2 weeks to make...Just 5 people?! That's incredible! You guys are so cool, and I want to support you in every way that I can :p♥ Ajané and Ian have put this game together so fluidly already, and hearing Smyang was so awesome! I'm so excited to see the other members' designs/facial expressions, and more backgrounds to save onto my phone - Chieu X. Nguyen and Laynesis, you are art GODS...Jin's ending card KILLED ME!!!

In the end, perhaps you guys have already considered comments like mine, since I see that you guys may be continuing the game if you get BigHit's permission. Appealing to BigHit on Twitter, and sharing to friends - are there any other ways to bring the game attention? I've taken both surveys.